Idea
by AmberKendsLacy
Summary: Perpugilliam Brown once had an idea of how life worked, but times, like a certain Time Lord, do change. Part of the Classic Companion One-shot Saga!


Perpugilliam Brown once liked to think that she had a firm idea of how life worked.

She knew how many planets were in her solar system, she knew why the earth was round, why the earth orbited the sun, etc, etc.

But she never really had an idea of people. Ever since she was a child she had been told she was too polite, too courteous, too much like a mat that people could just walk all over. Yet when she tried fighting back, she was told not to be so rowdy and to be more polite to her elders.

People confused her, so instead of studying Psychology like her mother wanted, she studied the rather difficult subject of Botany. Plants were easy, they grew, withered and died. Nothing difficult there, no changing of attitudes or opinions, just plants being plants. And that's how she liked it.

So why in the name of all that is holy, was she placed in the company of a madman?

When she first met the Doctor, he was of sound mind (and not a bad looker to in the American's opinion.) And just like all people, she was just starting to get to know him when he changed.

Except he took it a step too far, changing everything she once thought she knew about life.

The college student watched the stranger parade himself around the control room, rambling on about god knows what, besides it was unlikely he'd ever re-explain what he's talking about. Peri had gotten over being confused by what he was saying, so instead she made a habit of blocking him out, only asking questions about where they were going or what they were doing when she could get a word in.

She often hated asking where they going, though she could barely help asking it in the case of making him stop blabbering on about the sexual activates of Zygons.

Or was it Autons? She really forgot which creature it was, and hoped she would never find out.

And then there were the arguments, if Peri could have a dollar every time they argued over something practically unimportant, she would be a billionaire by now. The Doctor liked to think he won the arguments due to his logical 'debating' and height difference over the young woman, but Peri knew better.

She often backed down in their fights as whenever she heard his voice rise, she grew afraid of him. Yes, it was embarrassing for her to admit, but whenever she felt like the child-stuck-in-a-man's-body was getting a little too close to the same anger she had seen him with the first time they 'argued', she would back down.

It was nothing about her being a wimp really, more of her not wanting to be strangled again. Ever since the Doctor managed to worm out of Peri what had happened during his fits of Post-Regenerative madness, he had tried his best to reassure her that it would never happen again, but the brunette had learned better than to trust on mere words.

Peri knew it was nothing personal on the part of the technicolor nightmare man, but she'd had her fair share of deceiving men over the years. They were all the same, lying to her that they'd never hurt her, yet as soon as her back was turned, off they went.

She knew the Doctor was supposed to be different, and he was when she first met him. Young, polite, open-faced, he was everything she'd ever really expected from men when she was a little girl. He was a knight in shining armor; he beat the bad guy and saved the world like all heroes did.

It was silly of her, now that she thought about it, to cling onto the Doctor to travel with him. He was a touch disagreeable to the whole idea at first, what with Turlough only having just left him behind. And she probably did come off as insensitive when she asked to go with him, but at the time, and certainly even now, she was just concerned about seeing the universe.

What she didn't expect however was for the universe to just turn around in response and show her its ugly side. Sharaz Jek, Mestor, Jobel, the list goes on. All of them captured her, frightened her out of her wits and yet, they never killed her. Why this never happened was clearly expressed by a number of them as they said they were rather lonely, or apparently missed what beauty looked like.

Now while it was flattering to hear compliments on her looks, she would rather that these words didn't come from the mouths of semi-mutated slugs or some other rather displeasing and often insane aliens of the universe that had the career mind set of a universal dictator. She would on the other hand, prefer a nice compliment from the irritable Time Lord she was currently traveling with.

It wasn't as if she was co-dependent on her self-esteem or anything, but she would like it if every now and again, instead of yelling about how small and unimportant she was in the grand scheme of things, he paid her a compliment. Nothing big or grandiose, just a passing comment to make her day that much brighter.

But even that seemed like a little too much to ask of him. What with his often bully like ways of shouting at her when he made a mistake, or the times when his obliviousness could have possibly killed her, Peri often wondered why she bothered sticking around.

And then she would remember. She felt guilty.

As said before, Peri did kind of stick herself permanently to the Doctor's side when they first met, which in her mind lead it to it being her fault that he changed into this fashion less mess of a madman in the first place.

She was the one who slipped into the raw Spectrox and got herself and the Doctor infected with the poison, therefore making the whole Bat's milk ordeal her fault as well. And just when it couldn't possibly get any worse, there wasn't enough Bat's milk for him to also be cured, leaving him to die.

The guilt would often eat away at her at times, though she would never dare bring this up with the Doctor. His reaction would be unpredictable, but it would most likely end with him somehow, even if unintentionally, stating that the whole ordeal was in fact her fault and that she should always feel bad about it.

So instead of talking to the doctor about it, or letting the guilt eat away at her full force, she came up with a different agenda. She would stay with him for as long as she could, despite the creepy crawly monsters that should, quite frankly, keep their hands to themselves. And make sure he was going to be mentally and physically okay before leaving the TARDIS for good and moving on with her life.

But the time never came when she was sure he would be alright. Maybe he actually had a clue on what she was doing and just acted insane at times in order for her to stay longer, or maybe he really was co-co for coco puffs, Peri was never really certain.

Which was really a running thing in her life; never being certain. She wasn't certain about people, she wasn't certain about passing her Botany exams, she wasn't certain about leaving the TARDIS and most of all, she really wasn't certain about anything to do with the Doctor.

Would their hostile relationship simmer down someday? Could she ever really be able to trust him? Would they get along well enough for her to be comfortable to continue traveling with him? Were they ever going to head to a certain place in time were they wouldn't have to worry about bases under siege or dictating leaders?

And more importantly, would she ever be able to convince the Doctor to change into a more tasteful appearance?

Well obviously the last one was a joke, but for the others, she wasn't sure of the answers.

Perpugilliam Brown once thought she had firm Idea of how life worked, how the world went round. But then she met the most extraordinary man, a man who could change his face and argue until literal cows went home, a man who changed her perspective on life and made her uncertain her place in it.

A man whom when they only just met, died for her, and every day she did her best to repay the favour.

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**Please review, constructive criticism welcome**


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